a child of divorce from the pacific northwest

I had a very privileged childhood growing up in a small hippie town. My parents divorced when I was 10 and that's when I has an objective marker for my lifeline: childhood before the divorce & childhood after the divorce. I'll admit, most of my life's pre-divorce memories don't really exist? It's hard to explain...

Moving on: I was one of the first kids to have divorced parents. We really set the trend in our community group. It was a hard adjustment but something that I knew deep down that has to happen. A while back I came across old diaries I kept from those years, and man was I on a rollercoaster of emotions! It was really eye-opening to see how I was depressed as a child but because of my situation (third kid, two older brothers, divorce, split custody, etc), it was easy for me to blend into the background of my surroundings.

Growing up is a wild ride, y'all.

Looking back as an adult, my parents really didn't know what they were doing. Add in their emotional dealings with a divorce, they were going though some tough stuff AND trying to parent. My brothers and I didn't make it that easy on them...at least I know I was a pain. But I've always a bit of a pain. When you're forgotten at afterschool pickup, I feel a lil preteen rebellion is in order.

after a nasty breakup, I changed some behaviors and finally accepted the fact I have to face my demons head-on

Leading up to this decision, I had been living life on the edge. There is not a day that goes by that I don't thank my lucky stars I am alive and healthy (relatively). Before taking ownership of my actions, I was in denial that I was healed from my trauma. After all, I went through various forms of therapy throughout the years - DBT, CBT, group, individual, etc -I thought I had healed & been managing my mental health successfully.

But after this particular breakup, I had to look in the mirror and make some changes. The most significant one was to stop drinking as a way to escape the pain I was feeling. It also meant I had to adjust my social life as well. I still managed to be social but it was club soda & lime from there on out (currently, I do have a drink here and there but nothing like before).

This was also the time that brought on great changes in my career & living situation:

• I tried & failed at corporate life
• I dove headfirst back into my career that I have now devoted 10+ years to
• I moved to LA from OC (trust me its a big change lol)

It was also around the time I had an idea to start a blog. But you can read more about that journey here.